When a Loved One Struggles: What to Do About Their Firearms

On a recent episode of Gun Owners Radio, host Michael Schwartz tackled a gut-punch of a listener question: “My brother is having a mental health crisis and is receiving treatment from the VA. What can I do about his gun collection?” Co-hosts Alisha Curtin and Dakota Adelphia joined him to work through practical steps, legal considerations, and – most importantly – how to keep everyone safe without piling on stigma. What follows is a synthesis of their guidance, with my own perspective woven in.

First Triage: Separate The Person From Ammunition

Schwartz’s immediate, low-friction step was simple: if you have access to the home and the trust to use it, remove the magazines and ammunition. That alone renders most firearms inoperable on the spot. He acknowledged that in places like California, even moving ammo can raise “transfer” questions, but stressed that when someone is truly in crisis, safety must come first. My take: know your state rules and act within them whenever possible – but don’t let fear of technicalities paralyze you in a genuine emergency. If you do move ammo, document why you did it and where it is stored.

If He Agrees: Use An FFL to Move Possession

As a next step, Schwartz recommended a private-party transfer through a licensed dealer (FFL) to the trusted family member. That cleanly moves both physical possession and legal responsibility out of the person’s hands, at least temporarily. In California, he noted, you can’t simply “borrow” a gun for safekeeping, so the FFL route is the practical path when the owner consents. My suggestion: inventory the collection, take photos, list serial numbers, and get a written, dated acknowledgment that this is a temporary safety transfer to reduce misunderstandings later.

If He Refuses: The Reluctant Last Resort

Schwartz was frank about a tool many gun owners distrust: Gun Violence Restraining Orders (GVROs), or “red flag” orders. He emphasized that while he opposes abusive or predatory use of GVROs, this is the sort of narrow, acute scenario they were intended to address – where a responsible owner is now in clear crisis and won’t relinquish access. If you consider this route, expect paperwork, a judge’s review, and law enforcement involvement. My view: due process matters. If you pursue an ERPO/GVRO, keep meticulous notes of behaviors that prompted concern and prioritize calm, factual communication.

Quick, Reversible Mechanical Disablement

Co-host Dakota Adelphia offered clever, reversible steps you can implement quickly when access and consent are murky. For many pistols, remove the slide; for AR-style rifles, separate the upper from the lower. As Adelphia noted, the serialized “firearm” typically remains with the lower/frame; the slide or upper is not the regulated component in many states. Store those critical parts off-site, clearly labeled, and the guns won’t function. I’d add: check your state definitions (they vary), photograph what you removed, and keep those parts locked, inventoried, and traceable.

Control The Locks: Safes, Keys, And Combinations

Adelphia also suggested locking every firearm in the safe and taking the key (or changing the combination with permission). This keeps the collection on-site – important for families worried about escalation – while interrupting immediate access. Layer on cable locks for added redundancy. If you change a combination with consent, write that consent down and share where the combination will be stored and when it will be returned.

Create A Benign Paper Trail Before Anyone Gets Upset

A thoughtful point from Adelphia: after you’ve disabled firearms by removing slides or uppers, call the local police or sheriff’s office proactively and calmly note that you’ve separated components for safety with the owner’s interests at heart. That way, if emotions flare and someone later claims “theft,” there’s already a neutral record showing you acted to prevent harm, not to deprive property. I’d add: preserve texts and emails that show cooperation and concern – not confrontation.

When Treatment Triggers Legal Lines

Alisha Curtin highlighted a crucial legal reality: certain involuntary commitments or adjudications of mental incompetence can create federal prohibitions on firearm possession. She also pointed out that, separate from a GVRO, local police may conduct temporary seizures in connection with a qualifying mental health hold (e.g., a “5150” in California). The point isn’t to scare people away from care – it’s to remove tragic opportunities while clinicians stabilize someone. Family members should coordinate with clinicians and, when appropriate, law enforcement to ensure the policy side doesn’t blindside the care plan.

Weighing Legal Risk Against Moral Duty

Curtin was careful to disclaim that she’s not a lawyer or clinician, then made the key judgment call: sometimes you must weigh modest legal risk against the potentially catastrophic risk of inaction. In her view, and Schwartz’s, lives come first. My advice: don’t guess on the law. If you can, call a local firearms attorney or a reputable gun-rights organization for state-specific guidance. But don’t let fear of perfect compliance keep you from taking reasonable, reversible steps that immediately reduce risk.

Why California Feels Different (And What If You’re Not In California?)

Schwartz spent time on California-specific hurdles – ammunition background checks, the inability to loan guns to family even for safekeeping, and a rule that you may need a registered firearm at your address just to buy ammo. If you’re outside California, your state may allow voluntary storage, temporary transfers, or family loans with fewer hoops. Wherever you are, consider a written “voluntary storage” agreement that names the firearms, the storage location, and the conditions for return.

Don’t Let Fear Of Losing Guns Block Mental Health Care

The hosts ended with an essential human message: get help. Schwartz, Curtin, and Adelphia all stressed that firearm ownership should never stop you – or your loved one – from seeking treatment. If you or someone you love is in crisis, call 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. For gun-owner-specific resources, the team recommended Walk the Talk America, which connects the firearms community with mental health professionals who understand the culture. My plea: recovery is possible. Means safety can be part of the solution – not a punishment.

How To Have The Conversation Without Blowing Up Trust

My experience: the tone matters as much as the plan. Avoid moralizing and stick to shared goals – “I love you; I want you here. Let’s make the next few weeks as safe and boring as possible.” Offer options: “We can transfer everything at the shop, lock them here and I’ll hold the key, or I can take the slides and ammo for a bit. Your call.” People in pain deserve agency. When they choose even one safety step, it’s a small but meaningful win.

A Practical, Compassionate Game Plan

Putting the hosts’ advice into an order that works in the real world:

1. Stabilize: Encourage treatment, ride-alongs to appointments, set a daily check-in.
2. Interrupt access now: Remove magazines and ammunition; apply cable locks; if appropriate, remove slides/uppers or firing pins and store them off-site.
3. Document: Inventory the collection, photograph serials, save texts/emails showing cooperation.
4. Formalize (if agreeable): Do a temporary transfer through an FFL to a trusted family member.
5. Escalate cautiously: If danger remains and cooperation stops, consider ERPO/GVRO or consult law enforcement about temporary removal linked to a mental-health hold.
6. Support recovery: Keep lines open. Celebrate small steps. Plan for returning access gradually and intentionally when clinicians agree it’s safe.