I Worked at a Gun Store for Years – Here’s What Most People Don’t Realize

In a two-part discussion on Active Self Protection Extra, self-defense instructor Kaery Dudenhoffer sat down with her son, Toby Dudenhoffer, to reflect on his time working at a small-town gun store in eastern Washington. He was just 20 years old when he took the job, often running the entire store by himself three days a week. What he learned about gun buyers, firearms knowledge, and human behavior left a lasting impression – and exposed some surprising gaps in what people actually understand about the guns they own.

People Don’t Know What Gun They Have

Toby shared that one of the most frequent issues he encountered was people walking in asking for accessories, like magazines or holsters, for their “Smith & Wesson 9mm.” The problem? That description could fit dozens of models. When he asked for specifics, many couldn’t provide a model number or any details at all. Toby often had to rely on guesswork, case comparisons, or trial and error just to help them figure out what they even owned. As Kaery pointed out, this type of confusion happened more than once a week.

The Ammo That Confused Everyone

Kaery and Toby also discussed the hype around certain types of ammunition, especially RIP (Radically Invasive Projectile) rounds. Toby recalled customers getting excited about frangible ammo, believing it was ideal for self-defense because it “fragmented.” In reality, frangible ammo is designed to turn into powder upon hitting hard surfaces, reducing ricochet. It’s often used in shoot houses or steel-target training, not for personal defense. Kaery added that this confusion even spread to seasoned rifle club members, some of whom had never heard of frangible ammo at all.

Guns With High Hopes and Low Value

One memorable part of working at the store was dealing with customer expectations around used firearms. Toby explained that two nearly identical guns might sit side-by-side in the display case – one worth $400, the other $1,200. Yet customers would often bring in their own “lookalike” handgun expecting a high appraisal, only to be disappointed. “People didn’t really understand why some used guns held value and others didn’t,” Toby said. His experience showed just how often sentimental value and market value don’t match up.

Most Guns Never Get Shot

Kaery referenced a staggering statistic: an estimated 85% of civilian-owned guns in America are never fired, and fewer than 1% have more than 100 rounds through them. Toby’s time at the store confirmed that many used guns came in looking brand new. Customers would worry about buying used firearms, but statistically, most were practically untouched. As Kaery noted, we’re “a nation of gun buyers, not a nation of shooters.”

Optics Confusion: “What’s That Thing on Top?”

In one story, Toby recalled selling a handgun with a red dot optic attached. The customer, excited by how the gun felt, chose it and completed the purchase, only to ask at the checkout, “Hey, what’s that thing on top?” He had no idea what a red dot sight was, even though it was mounted on the pistol he just bought. When Toby explained it, the man was thrilled – proof that the sight wasn’t the selling point. This, Kaery said, reflected how optics were just starting to become mainstream in the civilian market at that time.

The Struggles of Teaching Red Dot Use

Toby also explained how difficult it was to help some customers understand how to use red dots. Older shooters especially would hold the gun at odd angles, waving it around, unable to “find the dot.” Some would even pick their head up, expecting to see a laser on the wall. Despite how intuitive red dots have become for many shooters, Toby’s experience shows that for first-timers, especially older gun owners, there’s a steep learning curve.

The Myth of “Flat Shooting” Rifles

In part two of their conversation, Toby touched on rural customers, often wheat farmers, who’d proudly tell him their rifle was a “flat shooter.” Toby, who had trained in precision rifle shooting, admitted the term bugged him. He knew that no bullet travels in a truly straight line. All bullets arc, rising then dropping due to gravity. While he understood what they meant, accuracy over distance, the term was technically incorrect. Still, he handled it with patience, knowing the importance of building trust with customers.

Handling Guns… Badly

Another topic that came up was muzzle discipline – or rather, the lack of it. Toby said that getting guns pointed at him was practically a daily occurrence. Customers would often swing the muzzle toward him, themselves, or other people in the store, even after being shown the gun was unloaded. While it bothered him as someone trained in safe firearm handling, he accepted it as part of the job. Kaery floated the idea of having a designated “safe wall” in stores where customers could be instructed to aim if they want to test a gun’s feel.

Big Box Stores vs. Knowledgeable Staff

One major takeaway from Kaery’s interview was the contrast between specialty shops and big box retailers. In many chain stores, Toby observed, the employees might not be shooters themselves. They were just filling a role. That’s a far cry from someone like Toby, who had training, experience, and a passion for helping customers make informed decisions. Kaery mentioned that students were willing to drive over 100 miles just to speak to Toby at the store, because he took time to answer questions respectfully.

People Want Multi-Caliber Guns – Even If It’s Not Practical

Another common theme Toby noticed was customers seeking guns that could shoot multiple calibers. While guns like .357 Magnum revolvers that can fire .38 Special are great examples, some customers took this too far, insisting that completely mismatched calibers could be fired from the same gun. In some cases, Toby would research their claims and find no support. This desire for flexibility in a firearm is understandable, especially during ammo shortages, but it can lead to dangerous misunderstandings.

Gun Laws Confuse Everyone – And Rightfully So

Finally, Toby talked about how much of his job was explaining firearm laws, especially in Washington State. He shared that most people were shocked they couldn’t take home their handgun the same day, even if they passed the background check. Kaery explained that some counties didn’t even have enough staff to process purchase requests, leading to long delays or no response at all. Customers would call the store, frustrated, but there was nothing Toby could do except wait with them.

The Gun Store Is a Classroom in Disguise

What stands out most about Toby’s experience is how much of it boiled down to education. Every transaction was an opportunity to teach someone, from how to safely hold a pistol to what makes ammo effective or legal. But what’s equally clear is that many people who buy guns don’t know much about them. That’s not an insult – it’s a reality. The real issue isn’t ignorance; it’s that many stores don’t take the time to educate their customers. Toby did. And people noticed.

A Rare Behind-the-Scenes Look

Kaery and Toby Dudenhoffer’s conversation is a rare behind-the-scenes look at the gun world from the sales floor. It’s funny, it’s thoughtful, and it’s honest. Working at a small-town gun shop may not sound glamorous, but it put Toby in a unique position to bridge the gap between “owning” and “understanding.” In a time when gun ownership continues to rise, maybe the industry needs more Tobys – people who are not just knowledgeable, but patient, humble, and ready to teach.