A growing number of women are openly saying they do not want children, and commentary YouTuber Anton Daniels says he would rather see someone make that decision honestly than bring a child into circumstances where the parent is unprepared, unwilling or financially unable to care for them.
In a recent video, Daniels reacted to TikToks from Shaneka Adams, Sosa and Natavia Marie, three women who gave different reasons for avoiding motherhood, ranging from childhood trauma and fear of the world to financial concerns and a simple belief that children do not fit the life they want.
Daniels did not agree with every part of their reasoning, but he said the larger decision deserved more respect than people often give it, particularly when compared with having children while already struggling and then expecting relatives, partners or taxpayers to absorb the consequences.
Shaneka Adams Says Her Trauma Ends With Her
Shaneka Adams described choosing not to have children as one of the best decisions she has made for herself, saying that both her personal history and her view of the world convinced her motherhood was not right for her.
She spoke openly about experiencing abuse and trauma as a young girl and said she expects to spend much of her life continuing to heal from those experiences.
For Adams, the concern is not that she lacks the ability to provide financially for a child. She said she believes she could provide and protect one, but fears she could never guarantee that child would remain safe from the same kind of pain she experienced.
“This stops with me,” Adams said, explaining that she does not want to pass her fears and unresolved trauma into another generation.
She also said her decision came from knowing herself rather than simply falling into despair about the condition of society.
“The best thing for me not to do is to bring life into this world,” she said.
Daniels responded that he was not angry with that reasoning, even where he disagreed with parts of her worldview.
He said one of the worst choices someone can make is having a child they never truly wanted, because parenting requires putting another person’s needs ahead of your own for decades.
Daniels Says Parenthood Should Not Be Automatic
Daniels argued that people often treat having children as a natural next step without seriously asking whether they are prepared for the responsibility.
He said someone may decide against parenthood because of finances, fear about the future, war, government instability, technology or simply because they do not want to organize their life around raising a child.
Some people may call that selfish, he said, while others could reasonably see it as responsible if the alternative is bringing a child into a home where the parent already knows they do not want the sacrifice involved.
Daniels was much more critical of people who continue having children while already dependent on social assistance or living in severe financial instability.
He argued that previous generations sometimes normalized having large families regardless of resources, and that later generations copied the pattern without acknowledging how many children struggled because they lacked stable homes, money, education or strong support systems.
His criticism is broad and will not apply equally to every low-income family, but the underlying point is straightforward: choosing to become a parent also means accepting responsibility for the conditions a child is entering.
Sosa Questions Being “Poor And Pregnant”
The second TikToker, Sosa, focused more directly on money.
She questioned why some people continue having children while openly describing themselves as unable to afford the ones they already have, pointing to videos in which pregnant women discuss struggling with groceries, bills and a single household income.
“What is the obsession with being poor and pregnant?” Sosa asked.
Daniels strongly agreed with that criticism and said he has increasingly noticed people sharing financial hardship online while continuing to expand their families.
He argued that in some cases those posts begin functioning as a form of online fundraising, where hardship itself becomes the content used to attract donations or sympathy.
Daniels said he has little patience for people who complain about rising prices while knowingly having additional children despite already struggling to support the family they have.
He acknowledged that groceries, housing and other costs have risen sharply, but said those realities should make financial planning before pregnancy more important, not less.
That is probably the strongest practical point in this part of the discussion. Economic hardship can happen unexpectedly, but there is a difference between falling into difficulty after having children and knowingly adding more dependents when a household is already overwhelmed.
Daniels Says Children Need More Than Survival
Daniels argued that raising a child successfully involves far more than simply keeping food in the refrigerator.
He said children benefit from stable finances, involved parents, education, community, structure and people around them who can help them develop.
When those foundations are missing, Daniels believes parents should at least consider delaying parenthood until their circumstances improve.
He also rejected the idea that society automatically owes parents unlimited support simply because they chose to have children.
“The world’s responsibility” is not to raise someone else’s child, he said, arguing that the primary duty has always belonged to parents.
That position may sound harsh when applied to families facing circumstances beyond their control, but Daniels was mainly directing his criticism at deliberate choices made before another child is conceived.
Natavia Marie Says Children Simply Do Not Fit Her Life
Natavia Marie offered perhaps the clearest version of the child-free argument because she said she had known since adolescence that she did not want children.
She recalled asking her mother at age 14 how old someone had to be before getting their tubes tied.
Now 30, she said she still faces repeated attempts from other people to persuade her that she should become a mother.
Some tell her she would be good at it because of how she treats her dog, nephews or other people’s children.
Marie does not dispute that.
“I feel like I would be a great mom,” she said. “What it is is I feel like a child is inconvenient.”
Her point was not that children are bad, but that she does not want the lifestyle that comes with raising one.
She also questioned why people who want large families feel entitled to pressure those who do not.
“There’s so many people out here who have children,” Marie said. “Some of y’all have 10 kids.”
She said choosing not to reproduce is not going to cause the world’s population to collapse, and asked parents to respect the boundaries of adults who have already decided motherhood is not for them.
Daniels Says That Boundary Is Reasonable
Daniels largely sided with Marie on that point.
He said people should spend less time pressuring responsible adults to have children and more time worrying about parents who already have children but fail to care for them properly.
That distinction runs through his entire reaction.
Daniels is not arguing that people should stop having children. In fact, he said raising good people can be meaningful and valuable, but only if parents are prepared to make the sacrifices required.
“You never ever stop being a parent,” he said.
For Daniels, that permanent responsibility is exactly why the decision should be taken more seriously before pregnancy rather than after it.
More Women Are Treating Motherhood As A Choice
The three TikTok videos came from different perspectives, but they arrived at the same conclusion: none of the women believes motherhood should be treated as something they owe other people.
Adams framed the decision around trauma and protection, Sosa focused on the financial consequences of having children in poverty, and Marie simply said she has never wanted the lifestyle that comes with parenthood.
Daniels found something reasonable in all three positions, even while pushing back against some of their broader claims.
His larger argument was that society should stop treating childlessness as automatically irresponsible while simultaneously excusing people who repeatedly have children without the resources or desire needed to raise them well.
There will always be disagreement over what makes someone “ready” for parenthood, and money alone cannot guarantee a stable family.
But choosing not to have children because you know you do not want the responsibility is very different from failing at that responsibility after bringing a child into the world, and that is the distinction Daniels believes more people should be willing to acknowledge.
Growing up in the Pacific Northwest, John developed a love for the great outdoors early on. With years of experience as a wilderness guide, he’s navigated rugged terrains and unpredictable weather patterns. John is also an avid hunter and fisherman who believes in sustainable living. His focus on practical survival skills, from building shelters to purifying water, reflects his passion for preparedness. When he’s not out in the wild, you can find him sharing his knowledge through writing, hoping to inspire others to embrace self-reliance.
